As I sat in a state mental hospital office, the doctor in front of me looked at me and said, “You have to understand that there are some things you can’t control.” For some reason his words became a Goliath moment when my controling nature was knocked off its feet. ( I wish its head had been chopped off too, but the control giant rises from time to time.) God used that experience in that office as a way to begin some of my healing. I suddenly realized that life was beyond me.
Think about it…what woman, mother,or wife does not want to control? We want to control our world so it will be the best possible world for us and the ones we love; but the problem is we think we know what is best for everyone. Only God knows what is best and sometimes He delivers the best in painful, unrecognizable ways.
I have two wonderful sons and I would love to control their lives, but I can’t. I would love to control the world around them, but I can’t. The only thing I have partial control over, is how I love them, how I encourage them, how I advise them, and how I pray for them. Talking to God about them is the key…and don’t try to control God in this way by telling Him what to do! No, giving them over to God is the scariest but most peaceful way to release them from my control and place them into His. It is scary because you know that God can place in their life or take out of their life anything he wants…ask Job in the Bible about that. BUT, it is also a peaceful thing since I know I am giving them over to the one who loves them more than I do myself. It is the most loving thing I can do for my kids…placing them into the hands of God daily.
Since I have handed them over (over and over again)some painful things have come into both of my son’s lives. It has been hard watching the pain, but God has taken each painful moment and in His time He has guided them to Himself.
I now have a new perspective on “losing control.” I flip that phrase into a whole new meaning. It means when it comes to control I never really had it and I might as well give it up…lose it. Since I have been able to do that many times, I now have the time and energy to deal with life that goes beyond me, a life out of my control.