putting my sister in her place

My sister Jo is the middle sister. I am the baby. I admit that I am spoiled. No reason to debate that at all. Some of that spoiled brattishness came from the hands of my sisters who did not let my parents spank me. So, I just can’t help but be who I am. However, I must ask, is my sister being who the books and leading psychologists say she is as the middle child? I hope not.

The middle child syndrome is fully explained on the internet. It is the place of having no place…stuck in the middle. The parents are celebrating milestones with the first child while grieving the mile stones with the last child. If you are in the middle you are stuck with a less emotional celebration…your mile stone is not the first nor is it the last. When you reach your milestone it has been done before by the oldest and it will be done again by the baby. For example…the first to go to college…wow. The last to go to college…boo hoo. The middle to go to college…?

No wonder there is a syndrome named after them.

The syndrome people call the middlers loners who lack the ability to hold down a career. They say they misbehave to get attention and work as little as possible. (Wish I had gotten the memo on that last one. Thought that was my job.) The list goes on to include a negative outlook on life and an inability to make decisions. Then they usually point out that Richard Nixon and Madonna were middle children. (So were Bill Gates and President Kennedy, but evidently they don’t count.)

I can’t speak for the middle but I have tried thinking about it and here is what I know about the middle. The middle of the pizza is the cheesiest and best. The middle of a cake has the most icing. The middle product on the shelf that sets behind the first one is the one I buy…come on I know some of you do that too. The middle of the watermelon is the sweetest, juiciest place. The middle of the Oreo is eaten first. Sitting in the middle is the safest place. Monkey in the middle was great fun if you were the monkey in the middle. Crème filled doughnuts have special middles that fill up the otherwise empty hole.

I guess I could end it there with the doughnut thing. My sister, the middle one, is the cream of the doughnut. Without her in my past and my present there would be a big hole.

She is the one that played with me. I have memories of that. I would sit in her lap and play patty cake. She also had this other weird game that dealt with biting her finger. She would take my hand in hers, entangle our fingers, and point out one of her fingers and say, “Try to bite my finger.” When I did bite it, I felt the pain…somehow our fingers got switched. We don’t play that game anymore since I became a wiser spoiled baby sister.

She is the one that helped me become creative. I wanted to make her laugh just as much as I tried to make her cry. I was an angel and a devil in her life in regards to that. I tested pranks on her, scared her silly, and would tease something awful. There were times I made her laugh so it became a way to test my humor before taking it to the world. She was my testing ground before living in the big world – my social teacher in life.

She may have felt like a middle child in many ways, but in no way has her life reflected any of the negative traits the syndrome lists. She has well defined goals and a well lived career. She is a retired kindergarten teacher who is applauded by her students and honored by her peers. Now she trains and coaches others who are entering into the world of education. She is the “cream of the crop” when it comes to education….and family…and being a spouse…and being a sister.

I hope I put her in her place…in the middle…right where she belongs.

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About 2b14u

I'm just a person. A person who has learned a lot of truth in the darkest days of life. The truth that glimmered, flashed and at times broke through like a day's dawn all came from the hands of a mighty God. His light makes the darkness worth it. To know my background, visit my posts titled "Jack-in-the-Box" and "Jack's Still Jumping"- Feb. 2012.
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17 Responses to putting my sister in her place

  1. Jewels says:

    What a wonderful post about your sister and the precious relationship you have with her. I loved reading this, thanks for sharing! I am also the baby of three children (spoiled too!). My sis is my bestest friend in this whole wide world, but she’s actually the oldest with 6 years in between us. I remind her of this fact relentlessly ~ even though I have more gray hair than her. 😉 My brother is our middle child, and unfortunately has very much fallen into the negative aspects of being a middle child. Loved your analagies of other middle things and… I too buy the item on the shelf from the middle! So glad to know I am not alone in that haha! Blessings for your day…

    Like

    • 2b14u says:

      I openly enjoy my position as the baby! Thanks for reading and the comment. I want to put a picture of us in the post but I can not get it to upload. I was successful once. I noticed your blog has lots of cool pics.

      Like

      • Jewels says:

        Thanks, I’m kind of a picture person. How are you trying to upload yours? I just click on the “upload/insert” icon within the “edit post” area, then “select files” under the “from computer” tab, when it finishes scroll down and click “insert into post.”

        Like

      • 2b14u says:

        I click the upload and it shows it is “doing something”(little circle thing is going around) then nothing appears. I think it is my browser. There is one place I have been successful in uploading, but most of the time I can’t get it to work. I think I need to go to the library and do it from there. Appreciate that response.

        Like

      • Jewels says:

        Hmm. Sounds like it could be some sort of diabolical evil plot working against you ~ or I guess the easier explanation would be… technology just doing what it does best ~ being frustrating. 😉 Best of luck…

        Like

  2. what a wonderful tribute to your sister! i love everything about this post and i hope she gets to see it!

    Like

  3. Anonymous says:

    WOW!! I did not recognize myself! You have made me feel very, very special. I know you were being very gracious! I just hope that I can live up to even half of these comments. By the way, I was sorry when you figured out the “bite my finger” game, but you brought to mind some great memories. I wish I had a dime for every time you told the elephant and mouse joke!! love ya

    Like

  4. Vince Chough says:

    The finger game part made me laugh too hard! Ouch!

    Like

  5. karmicdiva says:

    nothing in life replaces a sister. love it.

    Like

  6. lammilee says:

    Awwww! This is just the sweetest post EVER! Really loved the way you heralded your sister here! And especially since I have a sister (Vicky), who is 4 years younger than I, who I feel the same about!!! Being the oldest of 8, 5 girls and 3 boys…..you try to love each one equally…..and I do love each for who they are. But I have to admit on your blog (that the others will never see), that Vicky is my FAVORITE!!!

    Like

    • 2b14u says:

      We lost our oldest sister two years ago this May. Now my “middle sis” is the eldest female in the whole family. It sort of happened suddenly when I lost my Mom in the March before my sister. Jo is great person and a great sister. We were all close. You had a big family!!

      Like

      • lammilee says:

        I am so sorry for the loss of your Mom and eldest Sister. Yes we did have a big family! We lost our Mom when I was 11…..and everyone else were stair-stepped in agae under me down to 2 weeks old. I have kinda been “Mama Candy” most of my life…..but once all are adults, all want to be treated as such…..which is a good thing……but an additional “growing up” for the eldest! 😉

        Like

      • 2b14u says:

        Wow. We all have our stories!! So sorry you had to mature before it was time. Enjoy something childish today!

        Like

      • lammilee says:

        True that, sista! And I am about to take your advise by posting a short video that is cute, funny, childish, and yet profound. Got your curiousity going, huh? Look for it! 😉

        Like

      • 2b14u says:

        Can’t wait.

        Like

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